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04 August 2005 @ 01:17 am
Alright, i've already burned up most of my internet time checking email and reading a bunch of posts. Most everyone in the platoon is doing great. My team leader and my driver both got in trouble and kicked out of the TIF. Oh well. My other teammate has just been allowed back, yay! I pretty much live in a 6'x6' tower over looking 900+ detainees. There's the occasional incident or fire or whatever that breaks up the day a bit. The platoon is barely holding together under the restraints they've put on us. Layers and layers of procedures and rules regarding the detainees. I just sit like a zombie all day and watch these guys. It's like being a zoo keeper. You have to feed them.. and water them. They don't speak to you, even if you do talk to them in arabic. They crap in the middle of the soccer field because they're too lazy to walk to the WC. I actually have written down a bunch of questions on 3x5 cards to help stimulate my brain. I'm slowly becoming even more stupid than before. So, i'm applying for Vocational Rehab through the VA. The Army should be obligated to turn me back into a regular person. Or atleast make me less dumb? I'm still practially deaf in my left ear. They say it'll come back, but over a month has passed already!

Since i'm not allowed to take my SAW into the TIF, i had to give it up and qualify on an M4. Not a bad little rife. It feels like a toy compared to my saw though.

Blah blah.. enough army stuff.

I love getting hair cuts here. After they finish, they give you a massage. The first time, I didn't know he was going to do it and I thought he was attacking me. It was great though. I'm sure i like it a bit more than i should, but oh well.
It dawned on me tonight. I'm not going back to my old life. It doesn't exist anymore, too much has changed. I have to start a new one. It's kind of a strange feeling. I'm sure it will be strange for those around me too.
Somehow my bed is like five feet tall. I keep finding matresses and add them to my bed. It's actually getting fairly comfortable. Their version of a matress will pass for looks, but it feels like they made it out of old HMMWV shocks or something. Maybe they did? I should find out..

Midnight chow has become our "Jerrys" or "Steak n' Shake". We just hangout, make fun of life, and laugh at everything we can. We just don't have the time to unwind or use our fustration constructively. The other day i punched and kicked the door and broke it. The door didn't really deserve it either, so i did feel bad for it. They fixed him the next day with a brand new shiny handle though, so we're cool now.

Amazingly enough, my number hasn't been called yet. I've been typing with little structure in mind.. and not really checking my .. sentence correctness.. (i need rehab!) Well, i'm going to go shower, try to remember some details of my life, and go to sleep. I haven't been able to remember a dream in a while.. maybe tonight..

PS: I am an EXPERT at the staring game. I practice for like 80 hrs a week. try me..
Scott Carnesspamlord on August 4th, 2005 02:04 am (UTC)
Yes, the M4's feel like there going to break on you because there so light, but there nice once you get used to them. I was given both an M16 and an M4 at Robin Sage, I never even touched the M16. Had some Psy-Ops kid telling me how much better the M16 was with its "burst" where as the M4 is half as light and has "auto".
Dan: sakewarraven on August 4th, 2005 02:52 am (UTC)
yeah, i know how you feel with all the procedures and regulations. makes you feel like you're supposed to be this person of authority, but your hands are being held down by gravimetric hand-irons.

The other day i cleaned up the basement and found a bunch of your stuff, like the picture that Jen drew for you way back in the day. i'm pretty sure i might have seen all those pics of HMMWV's and Bradley's. Well, i was thinking of decorating the dungeon a bit.. think it would be ok if i used those? I've been trying to get some real organization going down there. My old desk is down there, and it's perfect for a workbench. The table we build is currently the server maintainence(sp?) terminal. I'm getting another lappy.. off ebay. so, that makes 2 now, lol. one is an old 100mHz lappy, and this one i'm getting tomorrow or the day after is a 400. should be neat.

I've been having a lot of down time in the last week. So i went and bought an MMORPG. It's called Guild Wars. it's pretty neat. and there's no monthly fee. i think i'll start playing more of them, just to see what other companies are doing to make their games neat and interesting. and then we can top them all w/ Iron Will.. if you're still interested in doing that.

Wow, i think this is the longest comment i've ever made. Well, keep your game face on, you'll be able to relax here in a few months. Even if it's only for 2 weeks or so.
i.: chains ©couturedmousewings on August 4th, 2005 03:42 am (UTC)
I can imagine how an experience like yours can change a person forever...

*Eew* at those guys who refuse to use the bathroom. Very rustic, n'est pas? Massages? I don't like strangers touching me so I'd still act like they're attacking me. ;)


Take care.
prettierinpinkprettierinpink on August 4th, 2005 07:29 pm (UTC)
*ahem* i do believe i sense a challenge in the air, when you're here in nov: STARING CONTEST CHALLENGE!!

i have a package to send to you, i have to re-pack it so it doesn't rattle (what kind of fucked up postal rule is that?) and then i have to wait till i have the money to send it to you.
if you haven't figured, i haven't been working that all so i'm super uber super broke (my last pay check was a grand total of $52)

in other news: my friend laura is pregnant, mikey's brother is getting married, and my boobs grew!!! i personaly think the last bit is the best.
much love, and stop beating up innocent doors. at least attack a dirty drawer (perverts, all those drawers) or mattress (it would be fun to stab one?)

oh yeah the pop culture in america is currently at an all time low, so be glad you are away.
Dan: cheat raverwarraven on August 4th, 2005 11:01 pm (UTC)
i smell a dance off approaching!

i knew there was something different about you.. but i can't put my hands on them.

i can see it now, as soon as sean gets off the airplane, for 2 weeks all we do is stare at each other.. ah, what a time that would be. I would recommend trying to stay drunk for 2 weeks. that sounds a whole lot more fun.
Scott Carnesspamlord on August 5th, 2005 04:26 am (UTC)
My brother, drunk!? NEVER! I've never known an Army man that drinks. (Dear god, sarcasm doesn't suit me very well)
prettierinpinkprettierinpink on August 5th, 2005 02:06 pm (UTC)
when sean drinks he gets cuddly...this could prove interesting
ericiniraq on August 7th, 2005 08:40 am (UTC)
i work the compound directly across the way...where all the bad people are. in some ways it better because they're subdivided into little cages and we can control them more. on the other hand we have to do virtually everything for them. i agree about us just deteriorating as people here. what a waste.

i think i know what you mean about being different. this kind of an experience has definitely taken it's tole on my more happy side. my wife was commenting on how much darker my sense of humor has become and that's it harder to get me to smile now. that's not true...she's just too nice.
Dan: kenya tigerwarraven on August 14th, 2005 07:57 pm (UTC)
guess who i ran into? Lt. Palmer! he's in the 223rd now, or so it seems.
he wanted me to ask you to email him. he said he had the paperwork for your SF patches, and also wanted to know if you got your ARCOM. basically that was it, i then turned my doctors' note to the commander and was sent back home to rest(it was drill weekend but i came down w/ strep throat).

well, just wanted to drop that little tidbit, hopefully it brings some more cheer into your life.
Carnestibman on August 27th, 2005 10:23 pm (UTC)
Well.. that just made my day right there. SF patch. I feel really good now.. light, happy, and accomplished. Our HQ said they never got a copy of the orders and that it was probably rejected. As for the ARCOM.. "What ARCOM?"

LT Palmer is a great officer and we miss his leadership.
Hey Dan? Could you scan a copy of those orders and email it? I'd very much like to come to work with that patch on. Thanks a lot!
(Anonymous) on August 14th, 2005 08:20 pm (UTC)

Come on man, dont lose yourself! I know your still in there!


oh yeah long time to see by the way
and I dont have an ID but I think you know who this is
Dan: ninjawarraven on August 17th, 2005 02:42 am (UTC)
Re: remember~!
and if you're still not sure who that was.. here's a hint.

he busted his pants on your trampoline

(Anonymous) on August 17th, 2005 04:57 am (UTC)
Re: remember~!
Oh come on now, who hasn't busted his pants on the T?

Carnestibman on August 27th, 2005 10:28 pm (UTC)
Re: remember~!

Its been a while! We should get together sometime for a day or so.. just to hang out.
(Anonymous) on September 2nd, 2005 03:04 am (UTC)
It can take 90 days to start feeling human again after some hard combat, a full year to almost feel normal, and two years till it's a different world, a dream.
School would be a great idea. A light schedule and a way to focus your enery and head on new things, a future.
I'm headed home in a week. It's been a hard tour this time. Lots of combat.

Love You