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12 September 2003 @ 05:15 pm
I have a problem..  
Well, i found out i have a problem. The past month and a half or so i've been getting more and more irate and quick to get angry. The last week was really bad. I yelled at several friends, said horid things to people i like and respect. I finally realized that i had a problem thursday morning. I told my NCO that i needed help, and that i would be going to Mental Health later that day.

After a couple hours of questions, they told me i am developing a serious condition. I have to go back for a some 400 question test and a biological examination.

When i get really excited or do physical activities, i get set on edge. If someone does something that bothers me, i practically explode at them.

Mental Health told me it could be several things that could be causing this.

It is really uncomfortable.. When i get angry, it's almost as if i'm not in control and everything is fuzzy. But, after it's over and i calm down, i feel really bad for whatever i did. My brain feels "mushy". It is difficult trying to cope with something you did, but you never consciously decided to do.

Now knowing that i do actually have a problem, i went around today and appologized to all the people i may have said or done something to.

I normally do not think LiveJournal is a good place for extremely personal matters. But i'd like for my friends to know what i'm going through, and perhaps why i've been acting strange lately.

I'm not going to go too much into details, as it is personal. But understand that it's something that is treatable. Don't worry, I'm still perfectly normal. Well, maybe i wasn't ever "normal", but you know ;)

.. thank goodness it's the weekend.


NOTE: no comments on this one, but you can email/call me if you wish.